Ah, To Be a Dog (or cat!)
In Lord Byron's Epitaph to a Dog, he wrote that dogs possess "all the virtues of Man without his Vices." Indeed this may be said not just of dogs, but of cats and other pets that we welcome into our homes.
Our pets regularly teach us about love and loyalty, but they also can show us the power of being present. For as smart and imaginative as we humans are, we also get stuck in our thoughts in a way that is unique among animals. We get hung up on ruminating on the past, forecasting the future, judging ourselves, to go with many other "internal" battles. Our pets don't seem to be encumbered by this.
It makes me think of a parable that I heard many years ago in a training. I tried to find a record of it online to give appropriate credit, but couldn't find it. It goes something like this:
A man and a dog arrive to visit a friend's home. It is pouring down rain outside. The man knocks and rings the doorbell - no answer. He knows his friend is home. Meanwhile the man and the dog continue to get soaked waiting outside. Five minutes go by, then ten minutes go by. Finally, the friend comes to the door and apologizes and lets the two wet visitors in. Fast forward twenty minutes. The man has changed into dry clothes, is warmed up, and has a hot cup of coffee but continues to grumble about being left out in the rain and seethes with frustration. Meanwhile, the dog is curled up by the fireplace, snoozing, warm and content as can be, not a care.
What's the lesson here? One thing we draw from it is how easy it can be for thoughts and emotions to pull our focus away from what matters. The man is understandably frustrated to have been left out in the rain; yet, how workable and helpful is it for him to continue stewing on it 20 minutes later? He came to visit his friend and now instead his focus is on his frustration. This is a ubiquitous human struggle - we all struggle with being present and responding to difficult thoughts and emotions in a way that really aligns with what's important to us. In this case, it may not be so much about “letting go” of the frustration, but about holding it in a way that it doesn’t interfere so much.
As a therapist, I strive to help my clients relate to their thoughts and emotions - both the highs and the lows - in a way that gives them more control over their lives, even if they can’t control how they might be feeling. Woof!
(Pictured with this post is Millie, a trusty, happy companion)